Stories family exchange magazine aids info. Sad story for speed info
Dear editors!
Two and a half years ago I fell completely desperately in love. We met in some forum... No, no, I then advertised in dating. Yes exactly. This is such a cool ad. Very funny. In general, my tongue has always been suspended in an absolutely wonderful way and it’s hard not to fall for my words if that’s what I want... I honestly indicated my height, weight, and in general everything that might interest a potential lover. And then I was looking for him and only him - a lover. I was afraid of love. I wanted a simple, unburdensome relationship... That's all.
On the first day I received about twenty letters. In total, in just one month (then I took down my ad) more than fifty of them were received... I broke down about the tenth letter - I don’t remember exactly... I suddenly became disgusted with the abundance of complete idiots without education, intelligence, imagination... In general, without anything that could attract me into their arms...
I didn’t open my mailbox for a week, but then curiosity took over. In the first letter that had not yet been read, it was written: “If on such and such a date you have a day off on Thursday, then I’m waiting for you at the Mayakovsky monument inside the Mayakovskaya metro station at 15 o’clock. I’ll be in light, almost white jeans and light-colored blue shirt. I'm a tall brunette. I wish us good luck. Sasha"
It was 14.30... I don’t know what happened to me at that moment... I hate wandering around the city, especially in the subway. And time was already running out... I almost didn’t even bother putting on makeup, I just touched my eyelashes a little with mascara and ran... Without knowing why or how, and most importantly, to whom. When I arrived at the station, it was already 15.45...
I looked around and didn't see anyone who could be waiting for me. stood different men and women - they were waiting for someone, but no one similar to the description sent in the letter... Or rather, there was one, but I just glanced at him and turned away. There was no way it could be him. I love and always have loved handsome men... I may have been lucky, and I never had others... But this one... Tall, with arms thicker than my legs, with a square, manly face... Thick black hair almost to the shoulders, huge, covered with incredibly long eyelashes, also black eyes... I looked, swallowed and turned away. I walked around for a few minutes and moved to the opposite platform to go back home. And then he came up to me. That's him. The same one. He put his hand on his shoulder and asked in a low, slightly hoarse voice: “Are you Lika?” I couldn't answer, I just nodded in response. He took me by the hand and led me upstairs from the subway. We walked somewhere in silence for a long time. I was scared. I suddenly thought that he probably wants to kill me... He probably wants something from me... except for one thing - me... All the women I met were looking at him, and I couldn’t stand it - I laughed like a crazy woman - the theater of the absurd surrounded me from all sides...
And then, right in the middle of the street, he took my face in his majestic palms and kissed me right on the lips. On the street! In front of a surprised audience! Without being embarrassed by anyone!.. He kissed me long and sensually. For so long that when I finally stopped, I had completely lost not only the feeling of awkwardness, but also my orientation in space and had difficulty figuring out where I was... We walked until two in the morning. We only sat down on benches a few times and had a small snack a couple of times in street cafes. It seems we walked around the boulevard ring several times.
I don’t know exactly where we went... Because I didn’t see anything around. Just him and his voice. Everything else was on the other side of my consciousness. What we didn’t talk about... We even calculated a couple of differentials, when suddenly it turned out that two years before me he also became the winner of several mathematical olympiads for applicants.
I then forgot to put on my long pants and my plump legs simply rubbed against each other at the very top. Into the blood... Approaching the house, I was already moaning loudly from pain. The pain began long before, but I could have confessed... But when it got really bad, he realized it and got the truth out of me. It was a shame, of course... Sasha was scared and terribly angry with himself. On yourself, your carelessness and inattention. He was almost shocked with guilt. And I wanted to sing with happiness...
My friend entrusted me with the keys to her apartment for watering the flowers and feeding the cat... We met there two days later. I wasn’t going to throw myself into his arms... I had never imagined before that it was possible like this - on a second date... Moreover, my legs had not yet healed. I covered the wounds with adhesive tape and pulled on a black leotard with lace over it...
I was left without this armor and without everything else very quickly. And he treated my wounds and abrasions with kisses... It was... It was fabulous!..
He told me not to move. He just said almost rudely: “Don’t you dare move!” It was so unexpected and delightful... His hands enveloped me all over - from the tip of my toes to my neck, lips, nose and ears... I really wanted to fall asleep... and not understand WHAT he was doing to me... Because my upbringing obliged be indignant and not allow it. Because no one had ever done anything like this to me, and this made it even worse. Still, he was very big, and I didn’t forget about it, and I knew that he could do whatever he wanted with me...
He didn't do anything wrong. I felt amazingly good. He asked me tirelessly - right?, here?, good?, stronger?, faster? I was literally dying of shame, but he slapped me hard and painfully on the butt and said that he would definitely spank me even harder if I didn’t obey... And I obediently answered his shameless questions and drowned more and more in this ocean of sensuality.. Lord, what a lover he was... And he wanted me!!! It was so wonderful to share the delights of sex and love with him. Yes, yes, it was already clear to me then that this was love. Because you can’t be good with a person you don’t love... I don’t know... It seems so to me.
We met the next day... And again, and again... He brought me armfuls of flowers and several kilograms of peaches to work. He carried me bags of groceries and gave me advice on raising my son...
I told my husband that I was leaving. He was hysterical. It turned out... it suddenly turned out that all these almost fifteen years he loved me passionately, he just didn’t know how to show it. He was so scared that for his birthday he gave him a huge burgundy rose and earrings with small diamonds... Before that, I bought all the gifts for myself...
But it was already too late. I couldn’t, I just couldn’t... I was in love with a dazzling man, I wanted only him, and he only wanted me...
And then... One day, without warning, in the process love game, suddenly, like a magician, he took out a jar of cream from somewhere, picked it up with two fingers and sharply inserted it into the ass. I screamed in pain... And in surprise. He persuaded me..., calmed me down, pressed me tighter, whispered that the pain would now recede, pass and everything would be wonderful. He entered me... It became even more painful... He did not move, and I relaxed... But when he began to move... God, how terrible it was and how excruciatingly painful... But I so wanted him to feel good ... And I endured it all until the very end. He screamed when he poured himself into me... Like never before... He felt good... I was horrified because I realized that now he would want to do this always...
I turned out to be right. He was not even stopped by the bleeding that opened that first time and all subsequent times... I tried to be treated, I tried to somehow alleviate this tearing pain that was becoming more and more unbearable... Nothing helped... I endured it. I couldn’t refuse him, because I loved him madly and, besides, both BEFORE and AFTER he gave me such tenderness and bliss... and I him...
This went on for four months. I have already begun to get used to this duty. I made peace with it. Blood appeared less and less. And sometimes it was done without pain...
And then he didn't come. I missed a date... and when we met, I was colder than usual. And suddenly he pulled away when I tried to give him a blowjob. I always just adored him, but now I didn’t want to... And I came only once, and didn’t want to anymore...
I didn't see him at all for the next week. Then he appeared again... and again only once I was able to bring him to orgasm...
He called and said that he was leaving on a business trip. He asked me not to worry and wait. “I know you, little bitch, your places are itching, but just be patient. I’ll be back soon and take over them...” He often called me all sorts of names in the heat of the moment... Not offensively, but somehow affectionately and very sexy he got it...
He did not appear for almost two months, I began to worry and write letters to him... They remained unanswered. This went on for another month. And then... Then he called. Just to say that I, of course, am a miracle and a beauty and a smart girl, but... I don’t give it to the ass... That is, I do, but he feels that I feel bad and in pain, and it makes him feel bad It also becomes bad and painful. Because he loves me very much. He loves and cannot bear all this... He has already found himself a woman. Certainly! Of course, my dear, she is no match for you, he is older than you, she is flat-chested, three hairs in five rows, stupid... But it will be better for all of us. The sooner he leaves, the sooner I can forget him and try to find myself a man with whom I won’t have such problems. All. Dot.
I never saw him again...I only heard...For almost a year, he periodically called to complain about how bad he was with his new woman and how she doesn't understand him. I cried, covering my mouth with both hands so that he wouldn’t hear, and he didn’t hear... At the end of this terrible year, he tried to return to me, but he stopped himself at the last moment, standing at the threshold of my house... I heard his breathing coming from behind the door, I heard quick steps away - down the stairs... That day I almost died. My heart was beating, my kidney was failing... I lost consciousness several times... I was taken by ambulance to the hospital. But is it possible to cure grief? He found out about this a few months later from my letter and responded with one word: “Sorry!”
I hope that my sad experience will be useful to someone...
The couple is an experienced reader of AIDS Info.
- Sarah, what is a “sexual disorder”?
- This, Izya, is like with you and me: you almost don’t give a damn about sex, and when you don’t
don't give a damn - it's not sex, it's just a disorder!
I just received a letter
"I didn’t receive a letter from your stupid website after registering. When I logged in
The site asks me for a password and I don’t know it. Please remind me he doesn't know mine
box in your database. Are you the only idiots there??? please fucking send me a letter
fuck with the password"
xxx: Last night I told my girlfriend that I want a threesome (me + a girl and another one), she looked at me so thoughtfully and continued the conversation without anything..
xxx: Today after work he comes with some kind of package, asked what was there - she said that it was a surprise .. I didn’t ask any unnecessary questions ..
xxx: Half past midnight, waiting for sex... A girl comes in and holds a “rubber Zina” in her hands...
xxx: It was a night of wild laughter.. there was no sex :(
The guy wanted anal sex! I don’t agree with anything! For 2 weeks he whined with this question! After which, I took a rope, tied his hands, tied them to the door handle, took baby cream and said: we’ll try it! I like it, then I agree! I’ve never heard such a squeal from a man! But the talk about anal sex is over!
From the AIDS-Info archive:
Kostya is like that busy man that all our dates took place in his car, and he drove, and I gave him a blowjob while driving. In a couple of months I traveled all over Moscow, but apart from his penis, I didn’t see anything.
I remember reading the following letter in the Speed-Info newspaper in the early 90s:
"We are twins, we are 15 years old. We recently slept with a guy, he is such a fool
I never realized that I was dealing with two... and now we're all pregnant."
A story told by a friend
After intense sex, a friend and her partner are basking in the bathroom.
Suddenly the boyfriend's eye is attracted by a spring from a ballpoint pen.
lying at the bottom of the bathtub, it is still unclear how she got there
got it!
There is a pause and he says in horror:
- Oh! Your spiral has fallen out!!!
A story told by a friend of my wife. About how her husband weaned her
curl the curlers at night. One day she built herself a suitable
structure on her head, put a plastic cap on top and lay down in
bed, where the husband was already reading the newspaper. He's been around for a while
lay indifferently, then put the newspaper aside and calmly looked for a couple of moments
at his wife, after which he got up, went into the hallway, took out a ski shoe from the shelf
cap, pulled it over his head and... lay back down!
Since then, this family has happily managed without curlers at night!
Letters to AIDS-Info
- In my opinion, this is the height of cynicism: make my bed in another room, and in the morning
ask why I'm so sad... Zhenya, Rzhev
- I found a way to deal with his women: I tell them how much he gets and
How many times a month does he wash? Not one of them has dared to check yet.
Sveta D., Chelyabinsk
Letter from worker Sidorov to the newspaper Trud: “Dear newspaper! I heard that
during a performance in Moscow by magician Copperfield from Red Square
The Mausoleum will disappear. Is it possible to expand the platform before disappearing,
so that the entire government can fit on it, and put a stool on the side
for our director?
http://www.russianmontreal.ca/index.php?newsid=332
After watching the latest news about his death, Saddam Hussein
decided to send a letter to George W. Bush to dispel it
assumptions about this and say that the game continues. How
As soon as Bush opened the letter, he realized that a cunning
Hussein's encoding, which read as follows: `37OHSSV O773H`
Bush just threw up his hands and therefore handed the letter to Colin Powell. That
shook his head and handed over the encryption to the most experienced cryptographers from the CIA. Those,
reluctantly, they did not achieve results, and therefore forwarded the letter to the FBI,
from where the undecrypted one was forwarded to NASA. But there’s nothing here either
it came out.
I had to call Rabinovich, who, with one single glance,
to Hussein's letter, reported to Washington: Tell the President that he
holding the letter upside down!
Jokes "Speed-Info" (1997-2000)
Jokes "Speed-Info", 1997-2000.
In the same dormitory, the boys laughingly dragged me into their room. But we Siberians don’t give up so easily. First they had to run for wine, and then sing songs all night...
What if my father finds out that I'm pregnant? He's tearing off the bridesmaids of all my friends.
In Zheka's company he constantly puts me in an awkward position, once I even spilled my beer.
In the end, I realized: I still couldn’t find anyone better than my wife. All that's left is to find a wife...
Everything about her is like a cat: figure, gait, look, voice, even her name is Masha.
Last year, a surgeon changed the shape of my nose. He found me with his wife.
Valerik is a big boss, and he stands somehow important.
Varka’s chest was heaving, and I expected her bra to rip, but it didn’t happen.
Vasya loved pasta since childhood, so when it came to bed, I was not at all surprised that his bed was so long and thin...
Something flared up in me and I really wanted to hug Lesha’s big, strong lips.
Vova forced me to give him a blowjob, citing the fact that I needed some vitamins...
Everyone who has money goes to different Canary Islands to look for adventure. Yes, it’s better for them to come to us, to Myski. Fishing, hunting, magnificent nature, cheap moonshine, even one prostitute.
For the first time she gave herself to me in the barn, in the presence of a cow; That's probably why I ended up growing horns...
Everyone points a finger at Oleg - mafia. And when he takes off his clothes, he looks like a man.
He says, make me a baby, and you won’t be drafted into the army! It was then that I remembered that military service is my sacred duty...
The girl from the house opposite does not close the curtains every evening and deliberately walks around the room naked. To spite her, I also began to walk around naked. But how can I tell her about this?
Girls, stop smearing yourself with Klerosil, they discovered a recipe for me, it turns out that the best cosmetics are sperm! It's just a pity that my boyfriend's tube is too small...
The friend said: so as not to be shy with women, drink some vodka. I've been drinking it for three years now. I’ve stopped being shy, but I also want women less and less...
If the teacher junior classes gives blowjobs, then how can she teach the younger generation with this mouth?
My wife read somewhere what to find out family relationships better after dinner and during sex - that’s how I gradually became a fat old impotent man.
The wife brought her boss into the house and, drunk, began kissing him passionately. At first I cried, and then I kicked the boss...
The day before the wedding we had a bachelor party, and it was so much fun that the wedding had to be postponed for a month until we were all released.
In one evening he called me Lyuba, Natasha and Kolya. And then I accidentally found out that my husband was dating a prostitute: my work colleague.
Sometimes you get up in the morning - the mood is such that it seems that you could fall in love with all the men in the city! And when you come home from work in the evening, you don’t even want one husband...
I have a positive attitude towards condoms, especially after my sixth abortion.
Every night I roar and think: how did nature allow the birth of Hitler, Chikatilo and my mother-in-law, Antonina Zakharovna?
When we couldn’t come up with a name for our newborn son, we decided to name him after the first person who came to visit us. First, my wife's aunt Izolda Abramovna came, then the neighbor - Tatar Nadir, in general they called him Alexander.
When he made fun of my mother, I was not offended, but when he put a trash can on her head, I became thoughtful...
When you castrate cats all day, in the evening you start to take a closer look at your husband...
When I gave Edik a blowjob, he said that Irka does it cooler. I simply remained silent, gritting my teeth.
When I undressed, Pasha started laughing and didn’t stop until he hit him on the back with a stool...
"Eva's costume" suits her very well, just needs to be sewn in here and there.
I was warned that Masha was a little plump, but I couldn’t even imagine that everything was so seriously neglected.
It was somehow awkward for me to tell him that I was pregnant from him, because we barely knew each other.
I was so sad and sad that Mitya immediately began to console me as best he could. But he could only do it twice.
I've always been told that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. How to find the way to his penis?
You can find a lot of pleasant reasons why you find yourself in bed with a strange man. For example, when he falls asleep, you can write something with a felt-tip pen on his intimate place. The wife will be happy.
My friend says my butt is as pale as an Eskimo's.
My husband says that I am a whore, but I told him that I had only one man before him: an officer, a company commander. What would your husband say if he found out about the company?
Then we often went to Olga’s to borrow money and fuck at the same time...
We happily experienced a blowjob, the first in Ira’s life. There were joyful tears and fun.
It didn't taste that disgusting - it tasted like beer. But after that I still swallowed a slice of lemon, being careful of an ectopic pregnancy.
We are three sisters; Olya married for love, Galya married for convenience, and I, a fool, married for luck...
Our eldest son is smart, probably because we conceived him in the assembly hall of the Academy of Sciences. Everything is clear with the youngest - he was conceived in the back room of a liquor store...
I hate it New Year. All my friends get drunk until they squeal, and then I find my underwear on the Christmas tree.
Before you have time to look back, you are already a woman. Then, just as imperceptibly, you become a mother...
He was modest and courteous, gave flowers, read Pasternak, and suddenly announced that anal sex helps with constipation...
He said that candles can be placed in more than just candlesticks. I felt myself blushing, and he melted the wax and glued the candle to the plate.
Very nice guys, and their faces are not disfigured by intelligence.
I told Pavlik that he was my second and that I didn’t experience an orgasm with the first.
It worked! Of course, I’ve tested this technique forty times...
Before opening my eyes, I tried to imagine the one who was snoring next to me. Reality has overshadowed every nightmare!
In the mornings I do so much with the chickens, ducks and goats that it’s simply not my wife’s turn.
A friend says that your newspaper helps in intimate life. Nothing like this:
I’ve been reading for three years now, but I still haven’t had an orgasm...
While Roma was in the army, I didn’t know how to behave with the guys. And when he returned, the guys now don’t know how to behave. Still, Roma is big.
Having tasted the forbidden fruit, I have been feeling its disgusting taste in my mouth for three days now...
After the party, Sergei stayed. But in vain he also drank port wine! When he felt especially bad, he looked at me pitifully and vomited.
After the wedding, I didn’t get a virgin (as my mother-in-law claimed), but some kind of visual aid from a medical dispensary! And the mother-in-law is having fun After Vova returned from a trip abroad, he began to replace all his native words with foreign ones. I even thought that in bed, instead of “I want it with doggy style,” he would say “I want it with lobster.”
The fluff got into her nose. She laughed merrily, wrinkled her face funny and sneezed.
The fluff came out of the nose along with the snot...
We divorced because he didn't help me at all. If I asked to take out the bucket, Sergei would poke me with his manhood...
I met my wife by peeping through a crack in the bathhouse. She washed herself and sang. I was stunned: what a vociferous...
My father-in-law chased me all over the village with an axe. And there was simply no reason: I saw him naked and couldn’t help laughing...
Having given Pavlik a blowjob, I realized that I had finally fallen in love...
Sergei caressed me for a long time in the shallows, but was afraid to fuck... He said there were a lot of crabs here...
Sergei made love tenderly and affectionately, although I fought back with my hands and feet...
My sister is only 13 years old, but she masturbates so much that her bed is shaking; I'm already 20, and I can't decide on this...
At first I wasn’t afraid, but when he took off his panties and I saw his huge anus, I felt uneasy...
Ooooh! This newspaper is my first guide to the world of the forbidden :) No, I guessed a lot of things even without AIDS-INFO, but my guesses needed reinforcement :) And the printed style is not the worst guide in this matter.
The publication in the 90s was quite expensive, so a select few in my village subscribed to it, but miraculously, the entire village read this publication :) Including my parents. This is how the “AIDS girl” wandered from hand to hand. I was just at that age when they didn’t hide it from me, but on the contrary, they planted it casually and inadvertently for the purpose of sexual education :) Our parents were bashful, brought up on Soviet morality, so it was easier for them to plant the corresponding newspaper in the perimeter of their home (and this had its own intention!), rather than looking into the eyes of a teenage child and explaining WHAT, WHY AND WHY. This is how my sexual education began.
It was interesting to read, remember. I liked the volume of the publication: I could read it several times without repeating myself. A colorful newspaper, bright, with good, as it seemed then, artistic design. The presentation is clear, without pretentiousness. What else do you need?!
Well, if we go into more detail by category.
Allegedly letters from readers- this is completely out! Even if we assume that the editors act as a proofreader of all creative correspondence, then they would set aside the author’s handwriting, so to speak, otherwise all the letters are as if they were selected: they give away the style of narration, turns of phrase, emotions. Although now, having matured a long time ago, I understand that such stories are, in principle, possible.
Posters of naked girls for the whole spread - this is something :) I know, I know those who collected these depraved, busty women :) Normal, by the way, the boys grew up, took the same busty women as wives - here it is: everything from childhood :)
Professor-sexologist Tumanovsky- this is just a ray of light in the dark kingdom in solving all sorts of sexual problems! For example, 40 men could not solve the problem of a seasoned, loving lady, but he - rrrrrrrr - saved her from suffering, and on the 41st she finally stopped - isn’t this joy to a body exhausted by searches?! :) Well, that’s all in that spirit.
Crime page also based on love and sex. But individual stories were written strongly. Category something like "Upside down" or "Upside down" I was shocked every time: there were such disgusting stories - it’s unpleasant to read, but "Underrated Phrases" always brought a sincere smile to readers :)
Show business stars they didn’t hesitate to appear in such a publication with their seditious memories of the “first time,” accidental pregnancies and sex on tour. There was a lot of nonsense about them and about them.
There were also educational moments like “Indian philosophy in the sexual aspect.” There, in addition to the body, the soul and mind were touched upon, which I could not pass by. I learned a lot of smart words from there then.
This “sexy newspaper” is still published: while spending more than one of my “maternity” summers in the village, I once saw a postman putting “AIDS INFO” into a neighbor’s mailbox. I confess, later I ducked into a neighbor’s house to rent it to read: curiosity got the better of me - I haven’t seen her at all for 10 years. In general, I looked through it. Either nothing can surprise us now, or the publication has lost its face in a sea of “young” competitors, but my disappointment cannot be hidden. That “AIDS girl” from my early youth and this modern one are two big differences. Everything is wrong, everything is wrong...Yellowness, obscenity...And I definitely wouldn’t want my child to be enlightened by this newspaper: there is too much vulgarity, ambiguity and outright stupidity. I’d rather explain it myself at the Nth age what’s what. If this, of course, is required of me, because now there are too many sources of sexual education and among them there are sooooo many that I can only admit: then, the former “AIDS-INFO” is the Best! At least it didn’t break my psyche as a teenage girl, but in some way instilled sexual culture. For this I thank her!
*...I worked as an electrician in a madhouse and saw how psychos took turns approaching the TV screen itself and forcing popular TV presenters to perform oral sex with them.
*...I don’t know how to be friends with girls. They dress and behave like adults, but kiss like little ones... (boy, 15 years old).
*...three teenagers were borrowed from one guy for a while rubber woman, which the three of us fell in love with with all the fervor of unspent love. Unfortunately, one of the teenagers had gonorrhea. He infected his rubber partner with the disease, and she shamelessly infected everyone else.
*...I don’t like women who don’t announce their orgasms with words... (man, 35 years old).
*...damn, I want to be cultured with a girl, but my hands themselves grab her tits... (boy, 20 years old).
*...we had already gone to bed, but she couldn’t stand it and asked me to show her my passport. I turned on the light
I went to the buffet to get it. She grabbed the crusts, flipped to the 9th page about marital status, saw a blank page and gave me a night of passionate love.... It’s a pity that there was only one. I slipped her my brother's passport...(male, 32 years old).
*...I work as a mechanic at a women's factory. You spend an entire shift rubbing shoulders with the women's team, but there is no happiness - just an erection (male, about 40 years old).
*...ko
I had a date with a woman with the head of a crocodile and the soul of an angel. Blue eyes, yellow teeth, blue lips. I drank two glasses of vodka. We slept nearby. This is how they reproduce (male, 37 years old).
*... I recently found out that my seventy-year-old grandfather is still having sex with my grandmother. However, you can’t call it sex, but the fuss was loud: as if Winnie the Pooh was persuading Piglet to go get a balloon. It’s not clear why they needed a condom? Maybe hold it in your teeth so that the dentures don’t rattle? (male, 32 years old).
*... two years ago I mistakenly gave my mother-in-law the wrong video cassette. Instead of a comedy film, I gave her to watch our tape of my wife and I having sex. The next day, my mother-in-law returned the tape to us with the words: “It’s strange that after all this you still don’t have children...” (man, 29 years old).
*...when you have sex with a student at a pedagogical institute, it’s like you’re torturing a living teacher (Vovchik, 22 years old)
*...how to persuade your girlfriend to wait for you from the army? Very simple. My friend, for example, when he joined the army, promised, in case of betrayal, to burn down her apartment and kill her entire family with a machine gun... She wrote him letters to the army every day... (boy, 20 years old).
*...today's men have become real impotent. You go to meet them, agree to love intimacy, but they have one problem after another. And everyone says that before this incident they had everything in order with this matter, but then I moved the wrong way, then I said the wrong word, then the dog on the street suddenly barked... (woman, 50 years old).
*...I have no complexes, but I believe that in romantic love between a man and a woman there is only one position - face to face. And no other, because he cannot tear himself away from her eyes and this is more important to him than seeing her butt turning white in the dark... (female, 20 years old).
*...in August, one girl would not have sat on my lap all evening and served my male apparatus. We scrubbed it with whatever we could, tried alcohol, mustard, vinegar essence and even gasoline, all the same, it was dangling like a rag, white, like a little dead man, not to mention love, there was no one to go to the toilet with. But compresses with hot water We still soaked it by morning... (male, 28 years old).
*...caught my younger ten-year-old brother with his classmate. Using a stopwatch, they put on and took off condoms for a while... on a kitchen rolling pin...
(girl, 25 years old).
*...sometimes you want to get married so much that you think you would marry a janitor...
(woman, 46 years old).
*...I am outraged by ads from suckers looking for wealthy older women. Yes, if I had money, I would buy myself such a seasoned dog, but a fur coat would be better...
(woman’ 30 years old). *...before my wedding I had never seen my husband’s pussy, but in vain, I would have thought: should I marry this fishhook...
(woman, 37 years old).
*...I somehow foolishly slept with one “new Russian”. There was nothing in his apartment. And his toilet finished me off: for the first time in my life I saw a toilet with a silencer...
(woman, 35 years old).
*...he sent me a photo of his handsome brother in a letter, and came on a date himself...
(girl, 16 years old).
*...my husband did not agree to have a child for a long time. I took a thin needle and pierced several condoms right through the packaging... Now we have a wonderful boy, Seryozha...
(woman, 29 years old).
*...what's the hardest thing about having sex in a hammock? That's right, the hardest thing is to undress...
(woman, 34 years old).
*...my adventure was a long time ago. I don’t even remember what was there and what wasn’t there
(woman, 61 years old).
*...in our village, the leader of the herd is a very anxious bull. It would be nice if he pestered the cows, but he doesn’t even give milkmaids a pass... And the women in the village these days are not spoiled by men, and in our entire village this bull is the only one who doesn’t drink vodka. I don’t know what the scientific name for this will be, but it seems to me that this bull will achieve his goal...
(woman, 44 years old).
*...I have been working in a commercial stall for a long time and watching how men buy condoms. If he buys a pack of condoms and a chocolate bar he goes to his mistress, if he buys a pack of condoms and a cigarette he goes to his wife, if he buys only condoms he doesn’t go anywhere, he just hopes for the best...
(woman, 34 years old).
*... wrote from the army to four girls, but none of them waited for me
(male, 21 years old).
*...my boyfriend wanted to sleep with me. I didn’t like him very much, and I didn’t have another guy. I
I decided to stop him from sleeping with me and splashed hot coffee on one place, but it doesn’t really bother them...
(girl, 18 years old).
*...men don’t know how to care, and they always call you to bed. I can’t do this right away: we need to find out everything about each other and utter words of cherished love...
(woman’ 63 years old).
*...according to my personal observations, blondes sigh tenderly in bed, brunettes moan, and brown-haired women are silent like fish and just stare at the fisherman...
(male, 29 years old).
*...I met a girl who was a crane operator through a newspaper. She looked like she fell off a crane. We didn’t even have time to say a few words when we started talking about marriage...
(male’ 34 years old).
*...I've already been on six dates, but I haven't been able to date anyone yet (boy, 15 years old).
*... found out that my best friend sometimes sleeps with my wife. He and I took two “cans” for a man’s conversation and agreed that he would give me power of attorney to ride in his Zhiguli, and I would not interfere with him walking with my wife...
(male, 41 years old).
*...has always been an honest wife, without any adventures. And after the divorce ex-husband offered me good financial support if I became his mistress. I thought about it and agreed: as a man, he’s not too bad. But I soon realized that this was not for me. Refused the role of a kept woman...
(woman, 34 years old).
